If I could, I would conduct every job interview at a little league game of the applicant’s child.

Anyone who blamed the umpire for the outcome of a game would never be employed.

Before you agree to marry someone, attend a game of their favorite sports team. It’s okay if they yell at an umpire or do not like a call, but if they blame the umpire for the outcome—run.

Never hire, or marry, someone who blames an umpire for an outcome.

If they wrongly place blame in sports, they will likely do so at work and home.

Humanity loves to place blame. It excuses our failures, justifies our actions, diverts negative attention away from us, and allows us to play our favorite role—that of victim.

Blame is fun.

In 2003 the Chicago Cubs were 5 outs away from their first World Series appearance since 1945. Leading the Florida Marlins 3–0 a ball was hit in foul territory and the Cubs left-fielder went to make a play. As Moises Alou reached to catch the ball, Steve Bartman, a long-time Cub fan instinctively reached for it as well interfering with the play and taking away a sure out for the Cubs.

The Marlins went on to score 8 runs before the Cubs got the final two outs. The Marlins won the game, the series and went on to win the World Series.

Chicago blamed Bartman.  They blamed a fan.

What’s interesting is they didn’t blame Alex Gonzalez. Two batters after the Bartman incident, a ground ball was hit to Gonzalez for a simple inning-ending double play. Gonzalez booted the ball and the Cubs haven’t been good since.

Clearly one foul ball did not cause the Cubs to give up 8 runs to the Marlins. Obviously, an error by a player was far more important than possible interference by a fan. Without a doubt, one play never determines the outcome.

Yet we blame, because it feels far better than to take personal responsibility.

We love an excuse—bad calls, bad umpires, bad luck—because excuses don’t require any change from us.

Blame and don’t change. Blame and don’t consider what you could’ve done differently. Blame and don’t form a game plan of how to get a different outcome next time. Blame others and feel better about yourself.

There is only one problem with blame—it is useless.

It serves no purpose.

Consider:

How does blaming an official change an outcome? How does it make you more likely to win the next time?

How does blaming the government make life better? How does it cause you to contribute better to society?

Of course it doesn’t.

Blame might make us feel better but it does not help.

Whether you are hiring an employee or choosing someone to marry, never get into relationship with someone who loves to blame because I assure you it will not be long before they blame you.

They will blame you for their failures, their mistakes, their inabilities, their unhappiness.

Instead of taking responsibility for their lives, actions, and ideas, they will forever look for an excuse and more often than not that excuse will be you.

You deserve better.

Conversely, if you ever find someone who refuses to blame; who finds himself on the bad end of a call, but understands bad calls are a part of the game; who gets a bad break in life, but sees it as an opportunity instead of an eternal hindrance; who takes personal responsibility for his life—hire them, marry them, befriend them…do everything in your power to build a relationship with them because those types of people are rare and valuable.

Umpires make bad calls. Parents make mistakes. Bosses choose poorly. Spouses are not perfect. Wise people know this and expect it. They don’t let it surprise them or hinder their lives. Those who are looking for an excuse will find one.