I’m going to have to rethink Silas watching golf with me.

Last weekend I was watching the golf tournament while Silas was playing in the floor.

Suddenly he asked, Daddy, “What’s a reptile dysfunction?”

I nearly did a spit-take with my Coke Zero. In my opinion, this relaxing moment was not the right moment for that question.

I thought for a moment and said, “Well, Silas, I guess it’s when your dinosaur falls down and can’t get up.”

A Job Reference

When I was in college I had a policy that I would interview for any church job someone was hiring. I didn’t want just any job, but I figured it would be a good way to get experience of the interviewing process.

A medium size church asked me for my resume because they were looking for a student pastor. I put together the resume with my history and references and sent it in. A few weeks went by and the church called me to come for an interview.

The interview went great and it ended with them saying, “We are pretty excited about this. If you don’t mind, we will call your references and get back with you.”

Obviously, since they were my references, I had no problem with them contacting them.

The next day I received a call from the Dean of Students of the college where I attended.

“What are you thinking?” he asked.

I didn’t understand what he was talking about.

“Why in the world would you interview for a student pastor position?”

I said, “I thought it would be good experience? Did they call you? What did you tell them?”

The Dean said, “I told them the truth—that you would be horrible. It would be the worst move ever. They would be better hiring a random 80–year-old man as their student pastor because at least a random 80–year-old man might actually want to be the student pastor. I told them you are great and would make a great pastor and if they hired you as pastor it would be the greatest move ever. But if they hired you as the student pastor it would be the dumbest thing I ever heard of.”

That’s when I learned you better be careful about who you list as your references on your resume.

A Man in Need

A kind-hearted church member once stopped to help a man who was holding a sign which read “Will work for food.”

The church member had some things which needed to be done on his house.

“I’ll put you to work; I’ve got some weeds that need to be pulled,” the member said.

“I can’t, I’ve got a bad back,” the man said.

“Well come with me, I’ve got some painting that needs to be done,” the member said.

“I can’t, I’ve got bad knees,” the man said.

“Well come with me, I’ve got some papers that need to be filed,” the member said.

“I can’t, I’ve got bad hands,” the man said.

With that, the church member left. He went home, got a piece of cardboard, made a sign and stood ten feet down the road from the man.

The man’s sign read, “Will work for food.”

The church member’s sign read, “No he won’t.”

Happy Friday.